It’s been a while, hasn’t it?
I’ve been toying with the right words to say as to why I haven’t felt the strength to write for myself, why I decided to step into the unknown, or why I let this blog go quiet for over a year.
Recently, I watched a video made by a former improv team member of mine, Cat Rebelskey, and she put into words how I’ve felt for a while.
Cat’s video is aptly titled, “Unapologetic Me” – where Cat talks about how she took a break from creating content for herself amidst a busy life schedule. Instead of her apologising for her absence, she firmly said to those watching, to stop feeling sorry for other people not being okay with who you are – at the end of the day you are only living your life for you.
I struggled with feeling guilty with abandoning so many things I enjoyed doing for a chaotic full-time job. I would sit on the train, commuting home from the office in London, and feel exhausted. I would find myself bursting into tears by the time I got home or notice my physical health was declining. I realised I needed to leave this position to focus on myself and find joy in writing – in living – again.
I do not feel guilty about this decision, nor do I feel sorry.
I don’t have a plan for next steps at the moment and that’s okay.
I do know what is best for me – even stepping out into the unknown.
I’m looking forward to sharing more thoughts, recipes, reviews and whatever else again. It’s been too long.
xx Hannah
Idealistic Iowan 